


I Wish I Were Evan

by buttercupkisses



Category: Atypical (TV 2017)
Genre: Arguments, Crying, F/F, Fighting, Kissing, My First AO3 Post, Running, Sad, Sad oneshot, Teen Crush, Unrequited Love, netflix show
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:14:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25552624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttercupkisses/pseuds/buttercupkisses
Summary: Izzie goes over to Casey’s house to talk about what happened the other night and is met by an upsetting sight.
Relationships: Casey Gardner/Izzie, Evan Chapin/Casey Gardner
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	I Wish I Were Evan

_I still remember_   
_third of december_   
_me in your sweater_   
_you said it looked better_

Usually, on Friday evenings, Casey would come over to Izzie's to hang out but tonight there was no sign of her anywhere. After non-stop calling and texting Izzie had decided to take matters into her own hands and made her way over to her friend's house. Even though it was the evening there was no need for a coat as the air was warm. The walk to Casey's wasn't too long and all in all the journey was quite pleasant.

_on me, than it did you_   
_only if you knew_   
_how much i liked you_   
_but i watch your eyes, as she_

For some reason, Casey had felt it was necessary that Izzie had a key to her house so she let herself into the house. Compared to her own it was nowhere near the size but so much more homely with parents that actually cared. Really the only person she had right now was Casey but she wouldn't tell her. When she was inside everything seemed silent apart from the clanking of saucepans coming from the kitchen.

"Hey Elsa," Izzie called in the direction of the kitchen but making no effort to start a conversation with her. She was only here for one thing and that wasn't having a long drawn out conversation with her friend's mother.

"Oh hey, Izzie I wasn't expecting to see you today."

"Yeah well Casey wasn't answering her phone so I thought I should check that she died or something." Izzie laughed making her way up the stairs as she continued talking.

"She's fine," Elsa reassured, her giving her a motherly smile.

"Well, I'm going to go and check on her anyway."

"That probably isn't the best thing to do."

But it was too late and Izzie had already made her way up the stairs. Strangely, the door to Caseys room was shut tight but ignoring it Izzie twisted the door handle to reveal Casey...

"Hey Casey-" Izzie started but stopped abruptly when she took in what she had witnessed.

...And Evan. No, no no this couldn't be happening. The sounds of voices and apologies followed her as she quickly made her way back down the stairs.

_walks by_   
_what a sight for_   
_sore eyes_   
_brighter than a_   
_blue sky_   
_she's got you_   
_mesmerized_   
_while i die_

"That was short," Elsa called after her, in a jokey tone from the kitchen.

If she had seen Izzie's face her reaction would have probably been quite the opposite. Once outside the door she stopped and took a deep breath trying to calm herself down but nothing worked. Slowly at first, she walked down the drive but with each footstep she took she sped up slightly till she was jogging and then running. Running from the pain from what she had just witnessed. Of course, she knew it was dumb of herself to think for a second that she and Casey would have ever worked, as a couple. How stupid could she have been?

_why would you ever kiss me?_   
_I'm not even half, as pretty_   
_you gave her your sweater_   
_it's just polyester, but you like her better_   
_wish i were heather_

It was just...the other night back in Casey's bedroom everything had seemed so perfect. Her lips on Casey's as they made out on Casey's bed.

Friends don't do that.

She had felt such a feeling that she had never felt before but it was like they were meant to be.

Friends don't feel that.

It blew her mind how such a beautiful human could have any interest in her boring self. She wasn't anything special with her brown hair and typical hoop earrings. She was so normal unlike everyone else she was up against to win over Casey's love. Wow, she really was making it sound like a challenge.

Everything was so perfect but maybe it was the fake kind of perfect. The one where you make up certain scenarios in your head and force yourself to believe it is true till you can't decipher between real and fake. Her love for Casey was barely requited, more unrequited to think about it. Unrequited what a stupid word but it described exactly how she felt at that moment. None of the feelings she had displayed towards Casey was felt back and no matter how hard she tried for it to not bother her it did. Badly.

_watch as she stands with_   
_her holding your hand_   
_put your arm 'round her shoulder_   
_now I'm getting colder_

When they had first met all she had felt was underlying hatred for the other girl and now it was a crush that had just broken her heart. It really went from enemies to friends and well it ended at friends A part of her was angry, angry at herself or Casey she wasn't sure but all she knew was that never in her life had she felt such heartbreak. God that wasn't even dating why was she acting like this. She was just a stupid girl with dreams about another that were never going to be felt back.

_But how could I hate her?  
She's such an angel  
But then again, kinda  
Wish she were dead, as she_

The sound of footsteps could be heard approaching her getting closer and closer making Izzy run harder and farther. Casey or Evan was the last person she wanted to talk about all this.

"Izzie stop!" the sound of a familiar voice yelled after her. Even though both girls were runners because Casey was that bit taller than her she would catch up sooner or later. There was no way she could get away from her now. Abruptly Izzie stopped but not turning around to face her all the same.

"I'm so sorry." Casey started grabbing both of Izzie's shoulders to turn her around so there were staring at each other dead in the eye.

"You know I thought we had something me and you," Izzie whispered holding back tears.

"I can't break up with Evan, even you know that." 

"You lead me on," Izzie cried, not caring any longer that she was a mess. Her mascara running down her cheeks and her eyes blotchy.

"No, I never." Casey tried, but there was a look in her eye of pity for the other girl.

"Evan or me?"

"You know I can't choose you are my best friend and I love Evan."

"Oh yeah, best friend." Izzie scoffed feeling herself choke up inside. "Have you told Evan that we KISSED yesterday or did you just coincidentally forget?"

"Well-"

"Save it and don't speak to me again."

_walks by_   
_what a sight for_   
_sore eyes_   
_brighter than a_   
_blue sky_   
_she's got you_   
_mesmerized_   
_while i die_

_why would you ever…_

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this while I was crying over twitter?? and thought i should put my crying to good use.  
> If you couldn’t tell it’s based on the Conan Gray song “I Wish I Were Heather.”


End file.
